“I’m from Lawn Guyland. How ‘bout Chu?”
by Alison Daurio, SUNY Cortland, October 19, 2004
AUTHOR: Alison Daurio, Global Journalism, SUNY Cortland, USA
I have a confession to make. I’m from Long Island. I’ve never had mustard on a hamburger. I order pizza pies and sodas. I’ve been to more Yankee games than I can count. I played dodge ball and ran through sprinklers as a kid. I’ve tried to find the Amityville haunted house. I know where Tiny Town is. I’ve spent many nights driving around aimlessly, and somehow, always ended up on the LIE. I don’t mind paying $10.50 to see a movie. I’ve had a fake ID since I was 14. I hate the Belt Parkway. And I’ll always know that somehow, the beach makes everything in life seem that much better.
There is something about growing up on Long Island that actually causes me to take pride in insignificant things such as these. Something about living in the shadows of one of the world’s greatest cities that lets me grin at the thought of apple picking or my keen ability to multi-task in a car. All of this tying together to form the idea that I’m from the greatest so-called-state in the USA, made up solely of Long Island and Manhattan, of course. I call this state New York, or rather, ‘Noo Yawk.’
However, based upon my experiences as a student at SUNY Cortland the last three years, I’ve learned that revealing my homeland does not always generate the warmest reception. Long Island, like any other place in the country, is a mix of good and bad. There are run-down apartments and mansions, beautiful beaches and places where the trees are being ripped down to put up another Target Super-Center. There are drunk drivers and museums, aquariums and people in too much of a hurry to be civil to one another. But since I’ve been a college student, it has become increasingly apparent that more often than not, people simply don’t see these similarities between Long Island and well, anywhere else in the world. Instead I repeatedly hear how Long Islanders make too much money, make too much noise, have too much annoying accent and join the Greek-life in too-large numbers in effort only to be tolerated. And that’s only to name a few.
It’s funny to think that before leaving Long Island, I had no idea stereotypes even existed about us, about us girls in particular. Just last week I found myself in conversation with a relatively over-confident frat boy, who, in a feeble attempt to ‘pick me up’, asked me where I was from. Since personally, I am quite proud of where I come from, I looked him in the eye and said “Long Island” (which to him, I’m sure sounded something like ‘Lawn Guyland’). To which he responded with a laugh, “Oh, another one of those.”
Admittedly, I must say I wasn’t surprised. More often then not, upon revealing the fact that I come from Long Island to someone who grew up elsewhere, I am met with such a response. Yes, that’s right. All of us from Long Island, all of us girls from Long Island in particular, are alike. We think alike, we dress alike, we talk alike and we even walk alike. We’re all the same. The same in that we couldn’t possibly be interesting enough to hold your attention. We couldn’t possibly be intelligent enough to carry on a conversation unless, that is, you want to talk about shopping or shoes, right?
Our world is full of stereotypes. People from Idaho are potato farmers. People from Alabama are rednecks. People from Romania are vampires. Generally, people don’t like to be categorized. We want to be recognized as individuals, not as a part of a joke based on the region we come from. So one question for all of you who insist on rolling your eyes at me the second you hear I’m from Long Island: Do I have the words ‘spoiled brat’ tattooed across my forehead? Last time I checked, I didn’t.
If people would actually take the time to get to know me, before immediately deciding that I’m spoiled or dumb, they’d realize that I’m really not like that at all. In saying this I’m not just defending myself, but all girls (and guys) from Long Island who have a reputation they don’t deserve.
People from Long Island are not poor, I will admit that much, however this doesn’t mean that the place is full of a series of cliquey communities where girls with pin-straight hair carry Gucci handbags and get BMW’s for their 16th birthdays. In fact, this is rarely the case. Most grew up in families of middle class income and acquired material possessions by their own means. Believe it or not, yes, most of us did have high school jobs.
And the dumb thing? I’ve mulled it over what seems like a million and one times now, and I can’t figure out where that even came from. Long Island has some of the best school districts in the country, let alone in New York State. In fact, my hometown of Wantagh had all five of its schools (the three elementary schools, the middle school and the high school) selected as United States Department of Education Blue Ribbon Schools of Excellence. If growing up in an area where 99% of high school graduates go on to higher education* makes us dumb then I could only imagine what would make us smart.
Upon entering my senior year at SUNY Cortland I have, undoubtedly, come into contact with a significant number of non-Long Islanders, nearly all of whom have, upon meeting me, made some negative comment regarding my hometown. This of course, does not necessarily mean that non-Long Islanders don’t like Long Islanders. In fact, some of the very people who have in the past made fun of my accent, or my clothes, or the fact that I don’t wear sweatpants to class, have now become some of my dearest friends.
However, there is one thing I don’t believe I’ll ever escape. And that is my accent. Whether it be with a close friend or a new acquaintance, I often find myself at age 21, playing the game of shadow.
“I’m so tired, I need some cawfee.”
“Haha. You said cawfee!”
Yes, I know I have an accent. Yes, I know it annoys you. But is it really necessary to repeat things after I say them just to emphasize that point over and over again? Long Island, like anywhere else in this country, has a regional dialect. Despite all the jokes and all the teasing, I plan to hang onto my accent. Clearly, not all Long Islanders speak in that aggressive, unforgettable accent of say, a Ray Romano type. But regardless of where we’re from on the Island, we are well aware that our dialect is stock full of so many linguistic inaccuracies that no matter how warm it makes us feel inside, no matter how much a conversation with another Long Islander reminds us of home, it hardly comes close to correct English. However, when I’ve been speaking a certain way pretty much since you learned your first words, it’s quite irritating to have people tell me how dumb I sound every time I open my mouth.
As I said before, I know I have an accent. I don’t need to be told. I add an extra vowel to everything. I have, on many occasions, used the phrase made famous by Fan Drescher: “Oh muy Gawd!” and I order “cawfee” every morning with my “chawclut” muffin. I add extra consonants to the ends of words as well. “Mah fingaz are getting tye-ud from typin awl night.” And yes, I know I neglect the letter R constantly. “Good Mawnin.” “I’m goin ta see my mutha.” “I got fawty dollas.” Ahh, to add a letter, to leave out a letter. That is the question. Oh, and I like plurals too. I’ve shamelessly used phrases like “yous guys” and “anyways”, and turned words like underwear into “underwears” and ideas into “idears.” Yes, I know there is no such thing as “underwears” and I know you shop in a “mall” not a “mawl.” But, seeing as I’ve never had a problem being understood, my accent can not possibly be so bad that it’s necessary to mock me whenever I open my mouth. In fact, I rather like the way I speak.
Attending a school like SUNY Cortland, where a rather large percentage of its students do, in fact, come from Long Island, I’ve always found it a bit odd that we’ve somehow gotten such a bad reputation here. What I find to be even more peculiar is the fact that we’re all friends. All of us like each other, and generally Long Islanders are friends with just as many Long Islanders as people from elsewhere. However, we are the target of all the jokes.
Sure, Long Island may be full of highways, malls and super-centers, but it also offers diversity, excitement, nature, and an active nightlife. We have some of the best pizza and Chinese food in the entire country, and some of the best schools in the country. Long Island is home to many friendly, kind, sweet people, just like anywhere else. With the calm waters of the Sound to the north and the Atlantic Ocean to the south, Long Island can feel like a home to locals and outsiders alike, if they’ll only let it. I feel lucky to have grown up in a place like this. It’s a shame I feel I have to worry every time I tell someone of my homeland just because of the stereotypes associated with it.
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DESIGNER:
Heather Cheetham, New Media Design, SUNY Cortland, USA
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